“I’m not worried. Asymptomatic runs in my family.”
“What? You’re locking us in all together so we can social distance? What kind of f**ked up sh*it is that?”
As the list of inmate deaths reaches 24:
“If an inmate dies in prison and the warden doesn’t acknowledge it, does anyone hear?”
Neighbor overheard praying:
“Dear God, I swear I will never take my good fortune for granted again, knowing you have graced me with all I have, just PLEASE, no more peanut butter!”
Guy 1: How much you want for the turkey?
Guy 2: 4 stamps and the peanut butter thrown in.
Guy 1: I don’t have any peanut butter.
Guy 2: No, I’ll sell you the turkey but you gotta take the peanut butter, too!
Random explosion on Day 58 of Covid-19 Lockdown, no one leaving the dorm
As God is my witness, if one more person asks me if I saw the weather report – we can’t go outside anyway, IT DOESN’T MATTER!
One inmate to another, after being informed by the Asst. Warden that our possibly becoming infected by guards is a “faulty premise.”
Mark my words, they’re going to end up blaming this flu on us!
One day later, staff member to inmate drinking coffee with mask around his chin.
You see, that’s why people are sick – because YOU PEOPLE aren’t careful!”
Inmate to others after yet another announcement that left us all feeling abandoned:
It’s time we put all the BS aside. This isn’t about your charges, your gang, your color, religion or car*. This is about being human, being a man. We are all brothers, we need to help each other, we need to all make it. So I don’t know about the rest of you – you make the choice – but I know I gotcha. I am my brother’s keeper!
*Car = slang for where you came from (the VA Car the DC car, etc.)
No comments:
Post a Comment